Best Funny Husband Wife Jokes

Marriage in which one person is always right. And always right and another person is husband.

Husband says to his wife: You will never find man like me.
Wife to husband: What makes you think i need another man like you.

Husband 1: What makes you join army.
Guy 1 2: I loved army and war and had no wife. What about you.
Husband 2: Well i have wife. And i wanted peace. So, i joined Army.

Once Banta was sitting with his wife and eating chicken.
Her wife gave him leg.
After watching this Santa told: If my wife is also here. Then she also give me legs.

Husband asked her wife: Can you survive in this small income.
Wife to husband: Sure i am, what about you?

Wife to husband: If i climb the mount everest what you will do???
Husband: Push.

Once husband and wife had fight. And they are not talking to each other.
Husband left one note in his table. Besides we had a fight. Woke me up at 5.
Next day husband woke up at 8. And note was there on the table.
Wake up it is 5 O clock.

Husband to wife: Will you re marry. If i die.
Wife: I will live with my sister.
Wife to husband: Will you re marry. If i die.
Husband: I will live with your sister.

Husband to wife: I invited my friend for lunch.
Wife: What the whole home is in mesh.
Husband: I wanted to show him all this. because he wanted to marry.

Wife: I am fat, ugly and wrinkles.Will you still going to give compliments to me?
Husband: Your eye sight is still excellent.

Husband was crying on his ex husbands grave why??
His friend asked why you are crying?
Because his ex husband ruined his life.

Wife: If i dismiss the cook and make food for you for month. Will you pay me??
Husband to wife: Sure my life insurance will pay you.

Wife: How much you love me?
Husband to wife: I can drink even your poison also. If you don't trust test me in evening.

Husband and wife had enough fight and after wife was very angry and told. I am going to my parents house and give you a divorce.
Husband to wife: Don't try to please me talking sweets things.